Sunday, November 1, 2009

Apocalypse Scenario Number 1

In celebration of Halloween, we here at Team WeComePrepared would like to present you with the long and awaited Scenario Number 1! Send us your comments.



Quarantine is a movie about a television show host who is shadowing the fire department. While filming, the department receives a phone call and rush to aid an elderly woman who had reportedly screamed but no one could get into the room to see what had happened. This scenario is not to be confused with its counterpart REC- the Spanish film that Quarantine was a remake of. Though they are the same story, the origin of the zombies is not the same in both movies.

We will be using our Zombie Plan Template for this scenario.

The "Quarantine" Scenario:

While reading up on some classic zombie material in your cozy little Spanish themed apartment, you hear the old lady upstairs scream followed by a loud thump. You find this disconcering and so do the rest of the people living in the complex. The building manager calls the authorities and a group of firefighters followed by a pretty girl and her camera man walk onto the scene. Upon breaking down the door they find the old woman- Miss Espinoza. To your astonishment she seems very pale, her eyes are clouded and red in color and she has a very sluggish walk. SHE IS A ZOMBIE!

  • Number 1: What is your enemy? INFECTED

In the beginning it is unclear but you are later given the hypothesis that each person is infected with a mutated species of Rabies.

a. Are they intelligent? Yes. They all have basic tool use and are capable of cornering and isolating you.

b. Where has it started and where is it spreading? The government has quarantined the building in order to maintain the mutated Rabies virus. As far as you know, it is isolated in your apartment complex and it started with that old lady.

c. Are there any known weaknesses? Blunt force trauma seems to do best against them. Bullets have virtually no effect on them as demonstrated by Miss Espinoza who has two clips shot into her and she's still moving. These zombies are also easy to recognize because their eyes are red.

  • Number 2: Where are you located? Apartment Complex

a. Note the advantages of each room.
Each apartment has locks on the doors, there are wide open areas in the entrance, multiple levels which can be reached by stairs or an elevator and easy ways to isolate the zombie menace. The stairs can be defended and there is a sliding garage door which can be used to temporarily block them off and at least buy you some time.

b. Note the disadvantages of each room.
You are limited in both space and supplies.

c. How can you defend the area?
So long as you acted quickly, you could isolate all of the zombies in one part of the building. Depending on where you are isolating them determines how long that'll last.

d. Do you have sufficient supplies and rations?
Absolutely not. You are limited to what was in your fridge at the time which can be anything from fully stocked to nothing at all. So long as your water supply wasn't cut off, you can just fast until the quarantine is taken off of the building but that'll only last so long and it will leave you weak against the zombies. You could raid other apartments for supplies but that leaves you open to the potential threats.

e. Do you have weapons?
Yes. You have two police officers with a standard issue pistol and limited ammunition, a firefighter with a sledgehammer and there are probably other blunt objects around the complex including tools and emergency hatchets. The only weapon that would require any skill to use would be the guns.

f. If you were to leave to find a better base of operations, where would you go?
Getting away is not possible. If you were to try and escape the building, the authorities would shoot you on sight- whether you were infected or not. There are snipers surveying all of the doors and windows and the building is wrapped in plastic to contain the virus.

  • Number 3: Who would you want in your party?
Since you're limited to the people in the building you will want to incorporate Fletcher and Jake, the two firefighters, James and Danny, the two police officers, and Lawrence the veterinarian. Just make sure they don't get too close to the zombies or you'll have to deal with them being infected later.

  • Number 4: Are communications down?
Yes. None of the phones work including cell phones and the electricity gets shut off.

  • Number 5: Where do you want to end up?

Well, it's obviously NOT safe in that apartment complex. You're best bet it to barricade yourself in your apartment with your allies and wait for help because the authorities aren't going to let you leave and probably aren't going to help you.

Pretty much, it all boils down to how quickly you act. There is decent breathing room and plenty of time for you to secure the area. So long as people listen to you precious advice, then you should be fine. You're limited to the people in the building so keeping track of the number of zombies shouldn't be too difficult. Just keep in mind that this is mutated rabies and can and does infect animals.... including the rats....

The Tactician suggested that you find a defendable area on the staircase, establish a barricade and plug off each zombie as they come at you. The Rogue suggested that you also position someone on the opposite side of the railing in order to create decent crossfire. Eventually you will be able to kill everyone who is not a zombie and possibly make a sign stating that you've killed everyone who was infected and MAYBE the authorities will allow someone into the building in order to survey it. But, of course, one of the rules of the zombiocalypse is not to depend on the authorities.

Send us your comments and suggestions for future scenarios or send us an e-mail.

Keep safe, kids.
The Team of WeComePrepared
WeComePrepared@gmail.com

Left 4 Dead Music Video

Monday, October 26, 2009

Saturday, October 24, 2009

H1N1- Potential Zombie Outbreak?

You've all heard of the H1N1 Virus (better known as Swine Flu), right? We've all heard about how contagious this virus can be and how we need to try and distance ourselves away from its potential threat. Especially since the death toll has risen over the thousands.

As of this morning, President Barack Hussein Obama (we like saying his full name because it rolls off the tongue nicely. Especially if you add a Southern twang) declared the outbreak "a national emergency." Obama has given hospitals the A-OK stamp to move infected patients away from the hospitals in order to protect non-infected patients and to better treat these individuals with the H1N1 Virus. There will also be a rise in available vaccine shots that previously were not available.

Of course, this has CONSPIRACY written all over it for some individuals who are convinced that our government is made up of robots created by an evil organization bent on destroying us or that they're super advanced evil aliens. We at team WeComePrepared find this highly improbable despite popular opinion...

We do however want to stress the importance of your health. What if the H1N1 Virus is the prototype for the inevitable "Zombie Virus"? (Which, from here on out, will be called H1N1Z. We would also like to make it a point that there is a difference between "Zombies" and "Zombis" for those of you cackling at your computers thinking we're uneducated on the difference. Read Rule Number 1 for details). Just because we say that the government won't and will not help you in the zombie outbreak, doesn't mean they are out to get us. It just means they're stupid and have too much on their plate to handle. Cut them some slack and work this shit out on your own. Wash your hands, don't cough on people and be considerate.

Stay healthy kids,
The Team of WeComePrepared
WeComePrepared@gmail.com

Friday, October 23, 2009

Chemical Burn


The senior member of our team and demolitions expert has created a separate blog on our profile dedicated to making things go boom!

If you ever have hopes of surviving the zombiocalypse, we suggest consulting her.

It's obviously a new blog so post comments and ideas.

Keep safe, kids.
The Team of WeComePrepared
WeComePrepared@gmail.com

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Rule Number 2: Know Your Surroundings


A follow-up of Rule Number 1: Know Thine Enemy


Now, this may seem like an obvious rule, but you would be amazed at how many people don't really know all of those details. Do you remember all of those science classes you took in grade school and how the teacher would walk each student through the "Safety Precautions" and would require you to memorize where all of the equipment was? Now, how many of you ever thought "Huh, this might be a good thing for when the zombies come!"? Because we did!

1. Take note of ALL of the Entrances and Exits.

Just because something is not a major entrance such as a door or a window, doesn't mean the zombies won't use it to their advantage. Take, for instance, dry wall. If you live in an unsturdy apartment, its possible for the zombies to just tear through it like paper (That is, assuming they have the physical capabilities). Another entrance that is easily over looked are attic and basement entrances and air ducts. Hopefully you live in one of those older houses that's actually made from quality materials like brick, concrete and stone.

While we're on this subject, let's take a moment to complain, shall we? People are lazy and impatient and that's going to get us killed. Houses are being built over night and its not because we have superhumans building them in the nick of time or that companies have started implementing The Sims in real life, but because we've started using shitty materials. These won't protect us from long term exposure to the elements let alone a horde of zombies! [/rant]

2. Memorize the Building Layout.

When we say "memorize", we bloody well mean memorize! You should be able to walk through the building blindfolded. Because what if the power gets cut out and you don't have a flashlight or other light source? Also, what if you are running from a horde in a panic and aren't really paying attention? Hopefully you can develop enough muscle memory to get through any obstacle.

Consider setting up a game with a few friends: Have your friends dress up as zombies while they chase you around and see if you can out smart and out run them. In the heat of things, you'll see how well you can escape.

3. Take note of ALL of the possible Barricades.

You may even need to take a point in American Ingenuity and BUILD A FAKE WALL.

4. Memorize where all of the Weapons and Rations are as well as other Storage Compartments.

Hope this helps.

Stay safe, kids.
the team of WeComePrepared
WeComePrepared@gmail.com

[picture by Knaveofclubs]

Upcoming Post: Scenario #1!

How Iconic Movie Characters Would Survive the Zombie Apocalypse

Ever wonder how your favorite movie characters would survive the zombiocalypse? Well, here's a site that gives a few examples such as John McClane, Scarface and even Keven McCallister from Home Alone. How Iconic Movie Characters Would Deal With A Zombie Attack!

Russell Franklin [Deep Blue Sea]


The Set Up
Russell Franklin, a corporate executive for Aquatica's financial department is sent to the facility to learn more about the experiments being held. While observing the doctors and associates, something goes horribly wrong and the sharks retaliate! (They swim backwards for Christ's sake!) And, to top it all off, the victims of these attacks stand up and start roaming around the facility craving human flesh and brains. Oh, and Aquatica is slowly sinking...

Available Weapons
Since Aquatica already had an assortment of weaponry to protect themselves from the threat of the sharks, the facility is decently armed. not to mention the fact that there is plenty of improvised weaponry such as kitchen appliances and gas ovens.

Allies
No one. EVERYONE DIES. Including the hot chick... If he's lucky, few unlikely people may survive.

Defensive Situation
It's sort of a win and lose situation. One one hand, the facility is flooding and thus limiting his interaction with the zombies. And, on the other, the facility is flooding and sinking into the ocean and he becomes bait for the highly intelligent sharks with lots and lots of teeth and a thirst for human blood. Did we mention TEETH?!

Mental and Physical Toughness
He's Russell Frankin, what do YOU think? He's known for rescuing people from an avalanche and endured the frozen hell of being trapped in the snow. Even for an older guy, he's still physically capable of taking care of himself.

Final Verdict
Despite many trials and tribulations, Franklin finds himself cornered. On dry land, he's trapped with zombies although they are limited in number, and then there's the water. Franklin has no trouble making the way clear of the zombie threat but he still has to find a way out of the Aquatica facility and will probably still get epically eaten by a shark while giving a speech that you just can't help but stare aghast at the screen for.

Body Count: 6 Dead Zombies, 2 Dead Sharks, 1 Dead Bird
DEAD. That's right. D.E.A.D.

Can you tell that we have a bias towards sharks? I mean if they can kill Mace Windu of all people... then we're doomed. End of story.

How about you, reader? How would your favorite movie character fare in the zombiocalypse? Give us your comments.

Keep safe, kids.

The team of WeComePrepared
WeComePrepared@gmail.com

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Zombie To-Do-List



Number 1: Secure a "Safe Room"


This can be anything from a fortified attic with two weeks worth of rations to your great grandfathers old bomb shelter.

Your Safe Room should have plenty of non-perishable rations, water, batteries, radios, weapons and other such equipment. Consider also having a town map, world map and large dry erase board to write up any details the news gives you on the zombie menace!

Number 2: Learn a "Life Skill"

These skills can be medical, weapons training, martial arts, science, etc. Because everyone knows that if you have a valuable skill you survive to the credits of ANY zombie film.... Of course you probably won't survive the sequel and, if you develop a love interest along the way, odds are one or both of you will become zombie puree.

Number 3: Have "Allies"

You'll NEVER survive alone. Be very picky with these so-called "allies." In Lamans terms, make sure they have useful life skills or, at the very least, are quick learners. Your ideal party size is around 3-5. Although, we here at WeComePrepared suggest a larger party- be sure to designate your cannon fodder (NEVER let them know this, of course. They may just play hero and screw up your beloved zombie plans!). Everyone knows that its the slower runner who will provide the BEST distractions.

Number 4: Have multiple "Zombie Plans"

We have already written up a general template for making you zombie plans. These include back-up plans. Remember: NO PLAN IS FOOL PROOF!

Number 5: Read the "Required Material"

It might be beneficial to add a library to your safe room with the required reading and watching materials.


Hope this helps.

Keep safe, kids.

The team of WeComePrepared
WeComePrepared@gmail.com

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

NOM NOM NOM

The Zombie Plan Template

Here is the general template the team WeComePrepared uses when preparing for the Zombie Apocalypse. Feel free to modify as you seem fit!

  • Number 1: What is your enemy? (i.e. Military experiment gone wrong)
a. Are they intelligent? (i.e. basic tool use)
b. Where has it started and where is it spreading?
c. How much time do you have to prepare?
d. Are there any known weaknesses? (i.e. can't swim)

  • Number 2: Where are you located? (i.e. At home)
a. Note advantages for each room you are located.
b. Note the disadvantages of each room you are located. (i.e. large windows)
c. How can you defend the area?
d. Do you have sufficient supplies and rations?
e. Do you have weapons?
f. If you were to leave to find a better base of operations, where do you go? (i.e. The pub)

  • Number 3: Who would you want in your party? (i.e. Chuck Fucking Norris)
a. Where are they located?
b. Do you have a way of contacting them?

  • Number 4: Are communications down? (i.e. Internet)

  • Number 5: Where do you want to end up? (i.e. Not dinner)
a. How far is it?


Here is an example using the previous template:

  • Number 1: What is your enemy?: Infected
a. Are they intelligent?: Basic tool usage
b. Where has it started and where is it spreading?: Started in Mexico and is moving up towards the U.S
c. How much time do you have to prepare?: A few hours at most
d. Are there any known weaknesses?: They will insist on mowing your lawn

  • Number 2: Where are you located?: Your workplace (in this case, a Toys'R'Us)
a. Note advantages for each room you are located.: BATTERIES, shelves, barriers, radios and walkie-talkies, short ration supply, water, limited storage closet, reasonable escape route
b. Note the disadvantages of each room you are located.: Glass entrances, No good weapons, weak flat roof tops
c. How can you defend the area?: Barricade the entrances and windows using the metal shelves, can make bombs from the cleaning supplies in the storage closet (given that you have a copy of the Anarchists Cookbook with you), BICYCLE CAVALRY
d. Do you have sufficient supplies and rations?: Limited
e. Do you have weapons?: Blunt objects
f. If you were to leave to find a better base of operations, where do you go?: Home Fucking Depot!

  • Number 3: Who would you want in your party?: A SAMURAI
a. Where are they located?:.........Japan.
b. Do you have a way of contacting them?:..............FUCK YOU!

  • Number 4: Are communications down?: Very likely

  • Number 5: Where do you want to end up?: ......Japan
a. How far is it:.............. Fuck. You.


And now, for a word from the experts!



Hope this helps.

Keep safe, kids.

The team at WeComePrepared

Zombieland Trailer



*UPDATE* Due to massive amounts of douchebaggery, Youtube has decided to delete this video and make it nigh impossible for us to replace the video with one that actually works! So here's the link.

How a Rick Roll Might Save You



Did you know that 80's music can destroy demons? And, who knows, maybe it'll prove to be that one distraction that helps YOU escape!

Monday, July 27, 2009

Required Reading Material

If you want to survive through the zombie apocalypse, you had better of read all of these book and seen all of these movies. Otherwise, you're dinner. Take notes.

This list will be updated periodically to include a more extensive library. Leave comments and inform us of material you recommend. Be sure to include links in your comments.

Keep safe, kids.

The team of WeComePrepared
WeComePrepared@gmail.com

  • World War Z: An Oral History of the Zombie War by Max Brooks
  • The Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection from the Living Dead
  • Night of the Living Dead (1968) by George A. Romero
  • Dawn of the Dead (1978) by George A. Romero
  • Day of the Dead (1985) by George A. Romero
  • Land of the Dead (2005) by George A. Romero
  • Diary of the Dead (2007) by George A. Romero
  • Day by Day Armageddon: A Zombie Novel by J. L. Bourne
  • Sunset by J. J. Ritonya
  • The Mammoth Book of Zombies by Carroll and Graf Pub
  • Pet Sematary by Stephen King
  • Pride and Prejudice and Zombies by Seth Grahame-Smith
  • The Serpent and the Rainbow by Wade Davis
  • Passage of Darkness: The Ethnobiology of a Haitian Zombie by Wade Davis
  • Famous Voodoo and Ritual Spells: a Voodoo Handbook by H. U. Lampe (for those of you interested in the Voodoo occult, we highly recommend this!)
  • All Flesh Must Be Eaten: A Zombie Survival Horror Roleplaying Game
An extensive list of zombie novels can be found on the ULTIMATE Zombie Book List.

Rule Number 1: Know Thine Enemy


1. What is a Zombie?

"This isn't the Republicans versus the Democrats, where we're in a hole economically or... or we're in another war. This is more crucial than that. This is down to the line, folks, this is down to the line. There can be no more divisions among the living!" Doctor Millard Rausch from Dawn of the Dead (1978).

Many an unenlightened individual has asked this question at one point and some even assume the definition to simply refer to a "zombie" as being an "undead being." This isn't entirely true. The origin of the zombie or Zombi comes from a Voodoo belief that the undead will eventually walk this earth.

The word "Zombi" is actually a variation on a name for the Voodoo god Damballah. In the Voodoo religion, a powerful "Boker" or necromancer gains control of a dead individual and controls the will of the Zombi.

As most of you are aware, this means that a Zombi cannot move beyond what it is physically capable of. Which means they are not fast and lack most of their muscle control. A Boker simply controls the will of the Zombi, not so much the undead flesh.

2. What is an "Infected"?

Here is where many people get the definition of a zombie incorrect: An "infected" is just that- an infected! This concept is a recent phenomenon and, honestly, is a perversion of the original Zombi stories from traditional Voodoo. However, the concept of the infected is probably all the more likely given this day in age- with overpopulation, disease, and harmful chemicals in our food, water and air.

Generally, like with their zombie counterparts, the infected will have the same limitations to their movement. However, it may still be possible for the infected to maintain their muscle structure since they are not undead (normally...). Take for example, the zombies from Valve's Left 4 Dead series. These creatures are infected and are only decomposing slowly rather than already being made of dead flesh. Because of this, they move swiftly and have the same strength as they were before the infection.

3. What are the "Mutated"?

Another subject in the ever growing "zombie pop-culture" is that of mutated infected. Since this is a disease or bacteria, the possibility of mutations occurring is highly likely. However, at the rate in which it is normally depicted is not probable. Mutations normally occur after long periods of time and once the cells have adapted to the changing environment.

In most of our scenarios, doctors and scientists will have more than likely already found either a cure or a vaccine for the infection before any mutations occur. If not the willpower of man, the flux and pull of our world will correct itself in due time and produce it's own vaccine- although this is a very optimistic way of thinking.

4. How can we fight them off?

This is where your zombie plans will come into play: First and foremost, you need to do your research. The team here at WeComePrepared will be posting a To Do List and a Required Reading Material post that will be linked to every post and can also be easily found within the archives.

From here on out, the WeComePrepared team will come up with randomized scenarios that we will post and we will include our own input on how to survive using our own real world knowledge and experiences. You, the viewer will have the opportunity to find loop holes that need patching and so on and so forth through the use of the comments.

We hope to hear your input and your viable arguments. Remember, in the Zombocalypse, no one person is wrong and no one person is right. That's why blogs such as this and teams such as WeComePrepared exist.

We hope that this post clarified some confusion on the various undead creatures and myths. We will be posting more in depth articles on the three previously mentioned and on any variant that you mention in the comments.

Keep safe, kids.

Sincerely,

The Team of WeComePrepared
WeComePrepared@gmail.com